The BS of My Life / P90X : Day 57 – 63

This is it.. the LAST Phase of P90X.. As far as I know, I’ve made it further than anyone in any of my social circles with the exception of 1 dude whose name I can’t attach to a face, but apparently he finished the whole program. I’m feeling admittedly exhausted and I needed a lot of drive to get through this week.

Starting weight: 177lbs
After week 9: 157lbs.

Here’s how the week went.

The Workouts:

Day 57:
Chest & Back, Ab Ripper X

Today was my first day back into P90X off of my Recovery Week. In comparison to the first recovery week one month ago, this was a fucking vacation. I was able to relax, gain some clarity, and keep up my focus on my diet. I went into todays workout with a little bit of a cocky attitude. I had been here before, and the workout was familiar. But knowing this was my second last time doing this workout before this project was done, I was very motivated to push myself.

My goal for today was to do all of the pull-ups free form, without any assistance. If I needed to jump down off of the bar, I would. But after breaks I would continue. I also was focused on using weight that would challenge me. I purchased a set of screw on dumbbell weights yesterday and was excited to be able to up my resistance.

One thing that I can say about having purchased the new weights is that it definitely required more time between sets using weights. Having to change the plates was a bit frustrating, but for the price comparison, it makes total sense.

I really pushed myself today, going for more at every turn, and I am very happy with my results. I did a total of 273 push-ups, 45 free form pull-ups and I upped my weight in every weighted exercise. I was really, really tired and got this random feeling of exhaustion and mental breakdown partway through the workout. It was really strange, but I felt entirely depleted both emotionally and physically. But I kept on..

Next up was Ab Ripper X, and I was not planning to take any rest time after Chest & Back to get to it.

Something really foolish told me that this would be a relative breeze. Maybe having done well in it for the last Phase put me in a place where I was confident in my ability to complete it with ease. This was not the case. I needed a lot of breaks, and was in a lot of physical discomfort for many of the exercises. I took so many breaks during Fifer Scissors that I’d guess I completed about 15 reps tops. Pulse Ups were brutal, Hip Rock & Raise was difficult, and even doing the Leg Climb was way harder than the last time I did this workout. The biggest shock for me was the Cross Legged Sit Ups. Having gone from doing the straight leg variation and being able to do the cross legged version, I was sure these wouldn’t be so hard. But holy fuck they were tough to get through. What frustrated me the most about this was that it showed how much relative strength I had lost in my stomach in only a week. True or not? If my stomach was getting stronger, wouldn’t these moves continue to feel routine? Is a week enough time to lose this much strength? I don’t know. I finished Ab Ripper X very strong, completing the whole Mason Twist sequence and I was feeling super jacked when it was all over, but something had me feeling unsure again about my strength.

Maybe its a result of having come off of a recovery week. Maybe its because I just did a workout I hadn’t done in a month. Or maybe I’m just not getting much stronger and I just look a lot better. I guess we’ll find out in a few more weeks.

Stay tuned…

Day 58:
Plyometrics

Getting into today’s workout, I knew not to be brave about the whole thing. If there’s any guarantee in this program, it’s that Plyometrics, at any athletic level, is gonna beat you up. So I was mentally prepared for this to happen.

I got into the workout with confidence through the lunge sequence and the squats, but when the actual tough stuff started coming in, it really started to beat me up. I had to do modified moves a couple of times and felt so gassed during some exercises that I could feel my quads wanting to cave in. When I thought about the whole situation, it occurred to me that it had been 2 weeks since I had last done this workout, so it made sense for it to be difficult. But damn, these guys got this muscle confusion thing down to a science.

One thing I can tell you is that it’s not difficult in the way that it was in the beginning. By any means. There are times when I’m doing some jumps and my fingers hit my ceiling, so I know I can’t be that out of shape. It’s just that my body hasn’t had the chance to grow accustomed to this workout in the same way as it has with Yoga or Kenpo because there are breaks when I don’t do Plyo.

I was a little disappointed in my performance today, but that’s if I compare it to what I’ve been able to do in the past. Overall I did very well, but I’m gonna need to get back to my old form if I plan on feeling a good level of accomplishment by the end of this Phase.

Day 59:
Shoulders & Arms, Ab Ripper X

I’m always really stoked about this workout. Something about it makes me feel like I’ve put in a lot of work and have something to show. That’s sort of the thing with these resistance workouts in the program. You only really do 2 in the week for your upper body, so when you do them it’s refreshing in an old school, working out in your room, kinda way. You feel ripped and you feel tired and you look like you’ve worked your ass off, and that’s the kind of thing dudes sometimes need to feel like their workouts are doing something. Let’s face it, the visible results after doing Yoga X aren’t comparable even though it makes you feel like a trillion bucks.

Anyways.. part of my excitement today was about the fact that I had more weight to play around with and I’d be able to push myself even further. And I did this today. On the exercises that required a set amount of reps, I did as much weight as I could do with a level of discomfort on the last 3-4 reps. On the exercises that didn’t require a set amount of reps, I pushed for a weight that would allow me to struggle through 8-10 reps. My goal now is to gain a little size back and higher weight / lower reps is the key to that.

I’m really happy with my results from today, and I’m thinking that I may need to grab some more weight soon so that I can really push on my last Shoulders & Arms workout. Strangely, as good as I was doing, I got the same feeling I had a couple of days ago with the exhaustion and emotional breakdown. It felt like I was so tired that I crumbled to my knees, with my hands on my face and I needed to cry. It was really strange. My body is really, really, really tired from these workouts, and not having more than 1 day rest is seeming to wear on my mental and emotional just as much as it’s working on my physical. It’s really tough. And I’m not sure about how these next 4 weeks are gonna be.

Next was Ab Ripper X, and since Monday was a bullshit run through it, I was determined but feeling shaky.

Something that I forgot was that after doing leg workouts like Plyo or Legs & Back, doing A.R.X. is really hard. Because you’re required to hold your legs up and do pulse ups, etc, the strength and endurance in your legs is really important. And today I was reminded of that.

Once again I struggled through this workout. Bicycles was tough, but I actually made it all the way through Crunchy Frog (something that doesn’t usually happen). Hip Rock & Raise was okay, but I had a LOT of trouble with Pulse-Ups. Fifer Scissors, as usual, was difficult as shit, I did the straight leg version of the Straight Leg/Cross Leg Sit-Ups, I got through V-Up Roll Ups, struggled bad through Oblique V-Ups, and made it through the Leg Climb and Mason Twist no problem.

This is really getting frustrating. You would think by now that I’d have a good enough handle on this workout to do it with ease, but for some reason I can’t. I felt really, really exhausted and on a couple of occasions today, felt like I was gonna throw up. I’m working really hard but I feel like I need something to help me get passed this last month. It’s getting very difficult.

Day 60:
Yoga X

Today marks the 60 Day point in my P90X project. Whoopty freakin Do. I did my workout really late because I had meetings today, so I didn’t get started until about 10pm.

Honestly, today’s Yoga X DVD was BORING AS FUCCCCCKKKKKKKK!!! Holy shit. I noticed right from the jump that I wasn’t sweating or laboring as early as I’ve been used to and I was unsure if this was because I wasn’t working myself hard enough, if it was because there was a cool breeze coming in through my window, or if it was because I’m really getting used to this DVD. Then by the time I got to arguably the hardest part of the workout where you reach your arm underneath your leg while in a deep side lunge and clasp your other hand behind your back while looking up, and it felt like it went by super fast, I knew that I was just bored and used to it.

I mean, you guys have seen my past posts about this workout. I love it. But today just really shocked me. I found myself thinking about Ideall Fall/Winter 09 and Spring/Summer ‘10 products and randomly coming up with graphics and design techniques. I was just not into this at all. I pushed really hard during Yoga Belly 7, which was nice, but still, nothing excited me about today’s workout.

I noticed that my leg was still messed up from my last Yoga workout where I strained my calf, so I skipped through the sequence after Warrior 3, and also through the Standing Leg Extensions. I didn’t want to injure myself this close to the end.

So much for feeling relief during Yoga. My mind just wasn’t in that space today..

Day 61:
Legs & Back, Ab Ripper X

I fucking hate this Legs & Back routine. Today I went for sushi with Stace and I think I have an allergy to shrimp because I started getting really woozy and ended up crashing for 3 hours at around 6. I got up, still really tired and knew I had to do this god forsaken workout and I was not happy.

My goal today was do all the pull-ups freeform. That’s my goal for the rest of this Phase actually. No more assistance from the stool. Just straight pull-ups.

This workout starts with Chair Lunges – which I hate – and today’s feeling of hatred didn’t change. It’s uncomfortable and I keep my foot on a wood table that just creeks and squeaks when I move, so it’s also annoying. I mean, I got through them okay, but it’s just a shitty way for your workout to start.

I ended up really pushing myself today in form and in controlling my movements and I noticed that my legs were very Jello-ish on a few of the moves. I even lost my balance a couple of times. lol. It’s weird, when you have your work sheets to tell you what you’ve done and what you’ve been able to do in the past, it’s easier to progress and push yourself to do more the next time around. But doing more just keeps you in that state of discomfort and controlled struggling. Today was a perfect example of that. I was really like a baby goat out there. lol. But it felt good. I struggled bad through the wall sits, not making it through the whole thing and falling to the ground at one point. I got up as soon as I could and continued through, but I dropped again. It was a serious, serious struggle. The Single Leg Wall Squats were the same thing. I was all over the place and in real pain. I felt really disappointed in myself and angry that I couldn’t do it. Not a good feeling. On the back side of things… my pull-up count today was 84, which I’m pretty happy with, but I want to be able to do 100 for this full workout. That’s what I’m gunning for before this is all over.

At the end of the Legs & Back DVD I had to take a seat because I was absolutely gassed. I found myself really short of breath and gasping for air for about 15 seconds. I drank a lot of water and was trying to calm down, but again, I was getting that feeling of wanting to cry and breakdown. I can’t explain it.. It’s just a level of complete exhaustion where it feels like my body is begging for rest. It’s pretty unreal. But I’ll talk more about that in the closing thoughts.

Next it was on to the ever dreaded Ab Ripper X. This fucking workout has been pissing me off all fucking week, so as usual, I was trying to outdo myself on it.

Once again, this is sounding like a skipping record, but I had trouble through Bicycles, Crunchy Frog, Pulse Ups, Fifer Scissors, & Oblique V-Ups. But I got through everything else okay. Mason Twist has actually gotten surprisingly easier over the last couple of workouts, but that doesn’t mean shit when I struggle through 5 of the 11 moves.

I’m pissed. And tired. And just want this all to be done.

Day 62:
Kenpo X

There was quite a bit to get done today. It was my niece’s birthday and I was really wanting to see my family, it was my brother Gavin’s birthday and we had plans to have dinner and drinks this evening, and it was the Caribana parade, so I knew traffic was gonna be hectic. Knowing all of this, I decided to do my workout in the morning and get it out of the way before running around.

As I’ve said quite frequently in the past, Kenpo is always a relief. It’s a good way to let off some stress and Tony Horton isn’t lying in the intro when he says that before you know it the workout is done. It goes by very, very quickly and I always enjoy my Kenpo day.

Today I felt myself getting pretty rickety. I wasn’t tired. I was doing all the jogging, skipping, jumping jacks and x-jumps during the breaks, I was performing all the moves with intensity and focus, my breathing was fine and my endurance was up, but I just felt rickety. On some kicks my balance was wavering. During the Prayer Twist in the warm-up, I was nearly toppling. And my legs felt weak. My assumption was that it was a result of 2 things: Plyometrics on Tuesday and Legs & Back from yesterday. I had kind of forgotten about the genius way these workouts are set up to keep you pushing yourself to your absolute limit, and today I got a cruel reminder.

Once the kicks started to come into the workout, I realized that my right leg really hasn’t totally recovered from the Yoga accident that happened last week. While throwing the Ball Kicks, my lower hamstring down to the top of my calf was feeling really, really strained and I needed to drop the intensity as well as the height of the kicks to comfortably move on. I considered turning the DVD off, but I’m not one to succumb to injury until it’s too late, so I continued with a lot of concern on that right leg.

I got through the rest of the DVD just fine, but again, I noticed through some of the drag/punch sequences that my form and balance was a little shaky. Again, I think this has a lot to do with the 2 leg related workouts from the week, but it wasn’t very encouraging throughout Kenpo.

When the DVD was done I felt like a million bucks. It’s just a good way to end a week of working hard and pushing yourself. I’ll see how my legs feel tomorrow, but as of right now, they’re not in a good place.

Day 63:
Rest or X Stretch

It’s 11:14pm and I haven’t done the X Stretch DVD. I know I should and I may just end up doing it before I workout tomorrow because my knees started to really hurt me last night while I was out for my brother Gavin’s birthday. Tonight they’re both really bothering me and I can’t even put my feet up on my coffee table without bad discomfort in both knees. I’m gonna ice them later on because this is not a good time for me to fall out of this thing because of injury. Thankfully tomorrow is an upper body workout, but if my legs still feel like this by the time Plyo comes around on Tuesday, I may need to reconsider doing Cardio X insteady. We’ll see.

The Diet:

Man, this “The Diet” section is getting dumb boring. You guys know wassup. I eat a lot of egg whites for breakfast and have added shredded turkey, 2 chicken dogs and 2 pieces of whole grain bad with nonfat butter to my 1st meal of the day. My post workout shake consists of 8 ounces of low fat Vanilla Soy Milk, a banana, mango nectar, a handful of strawberry slices, ice cubes and whey protein. I’ve been eating homemade jerk chicken breast – arguably the fattiest food I serve myself. I have salads with low calorie Italian dressing, eat tuna straight out of the can, and snack occasionally on soy nuts, but most often on sliced turkey and chicken with mustard.

Here’s the worst thing about this week – I bought these little chocolate squares from Le Gourmand in Toronto so my girlfriend could try them with me. My homegirl Zaki told me that they were great, so I thought I’d pick them up. It says that 1 serving is 9 of these chocolate thins, and they are fucking addictive!! I ate 3 at a time on at least 5 occasions this week. Not good, I know. No excuses.

Other than that, it’s been the same shit. Same shit. Same shit. No changes here.

Closing Thoughts:

It was a rough, rough week for me. On 3 occasions, while working out, I found my mind and body so exhausted that I collapsed to my hands and knees close to tears. It has been fucked. There’s a lot going on in terms of planning for my next steps creatively, and as excited as I am, I feel that I need this damn project to be over before I can take full control of my wants out of my life. My determination towards this BS of My Life shit has ironically become the bane of my day to day living and I schedule my whole day around getting my workouts in. I don’t want to fail myself here, and I need to get through this, but I’m feeling very frustrated and it’s deterring my thoughts about this whole P90X shit. I don’t feel stronger although I feel healthier. It’s like there has been a decline with my relative strength according to my weight. I mean, on paper this doesn’t make sense because I have proven that I am stronger by being able to perform more reps or push more weight, do more push-ups and get through more pull-ups, but my day to day strength doesn’t seem changed. I don’t know, maybe it’s just a mental thing because I’m a lot more slender than I was before. Who knows..

I haven’t felt this sick of any project that I’ve put myself through, ever. The Sober 165 lasted 75 days I believe? And the Beer Weight Experiment was only 30 days. To think that I have done 63 days of this project and still have 4 more weeks to go is a lot to deal with especially when you’re so focused on your next steps. I really feel that my overall emotional spiraling has a lot to do with how much time I’ve invested in this project. It’s insane. People really don’t understand how much I put into doing this and it’s become a very awkward struggle.

I’ll be back next week, hopefully with new spirits. Trust me, after this week, I’m gonna need them.

…

I think my closing thoughts about this week are best summed up in my Day 60 Results post. Read the entry HERE.

Welcome To The Legends League.

Read The BS of My Life / P90X:
Intro
Week 1
Week 2
Week 3
Week 4
Day 30 Results
Week 5
Week 6
Week 7
Week 8
Day 60 Results

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