On Sincerity..
by be.
It’s unfortunate, but throughout my life I’ve found that those who truly care about your well being and what you are up to, rarely ever say it. And those who have become so accustomed to feeling connected to you and/or the circle you are somehow a part of, ask “How are you” and “How’s everything with…” just because they feel it is polite. The odd thing is that dishonesty is more impolite when you can see through it. So in their act of social goodness and righteousness, they’re showing themselves as the asshole and/or bitch that they really and truly are. Or they’re just proving themselves as someone you really don’t need in your life. Sometimes it even gets to the point of them tuning you out once you begin answering their questions. note: it’s easiest to catch this when they respond with non-sensical comments that don’t relate to what you’ve just said. Listen for things like, “Right, right”, “True, true”, “I feel you”, and “Yeah”. When these comments are followed up with nothing, it’s just dull, responsive verbatim.
You see, here’s the thing. We’ve all been able to accomplish the fantastic feats of gaining 10,000 myspace friends, 2999 facebook friends, 500,000 twitter followers, and a few hook-ups that end with us awkwardly telling girls or guys we’ve met online to get the fuck up out of our beds and get on gone. But when you’ve started with a handful of the finest needles, why would you pour hay bales into the mix just for filler?
You get where I’m going here.
I’m guilty of it just as much as the next person, but here’s me on sincerity: Stop putting an effort towards those you feel you are supposed to be friends with out of necessity, and put an effort back into those who have proven themselves as people that you actually value. Remember that “Followers” “Friends” and “Hits” are not as real as a good old fashioned cup of coffee shared with friends, a laugh, and something a bit more genuine than playing your role in some wispy circle.
A lot of people have asked me what happened to me while I was gone in California for a month. The truth is, I realized who I didn’t care to ever see again, associate with, or find any attachment to. And it’s not that I don’t care about them anymore, it’s just that I was able to realize that I didn’t really care for them that much in the first place.
But that’s just me.
Welcome To The Legends League
- Bryan 'be.' Espiritu
Glad you got to that place. Things are never real when they feel forced and those people probably won’t miss YOU, but rather what knowing OF you could have done for them.
It’s true though, the ones we connect with for real for real rarely get a “what’s going on…” because chances are we already know. So instead we jump into the convo like we never left. And I love that part.
peaces.
“Stop putting an effort towards those you feel you are supposed to be friends with out of necessity, and put an effort back into those who have proven themselves as people that you actually value”
i hear that. i accomplished this a couple of months ago and it was life changing = )
this is eye opening. thank you.
You DEFINITELY just him home with me on this one. I am goin through that “cleaning out” of people that are the accessories in my life.
Your writing is always so…eye opening, as Mare said. It seems no matter what your writing about it always makes me think.. Your talent is infinite, and I thank you for that.
right right. true true. i feel you. yeah.
-always truthfully, never sincerely,
arowbe
I’ll quote your previous post.
“Everything else is unneeded and unwanted bullshit.”
Good to know I’m not the only one. There’s always going to be that point in your life where you finally realize who really matters, and who never did. The best thing I could have ever done was cut the toxic people out of my life, ditch the friends that talk shit and the typical leeches. It just became apparent to me that when you surround yourself with positive energy, you give out positive energy, and you will attract people whom you like to be around and who like to be around you. Why waste time on someone who breeds negative toxicity? Life’s too short for crappy company. Cutting those toxic people out of my life changed everything. Now I breathe easy, my heart is not heavy and I have a clear conscience.
It’s reassuring to know you can always be counted on to bring the realness.
Hope you’re good.
Im glad we got to have this conversation the other day.